THE TINDER BOX (and the wicked witch)

Some years ago I wrote a pantomime for The Maple Ridge Players and in due time they produced it. I took the play from Hans Christian Anderson’ story of ‘The Tinder Box’. It is quite a silly play, written for both adults and young people, with lots of silly songs and some romantic ones. Those who saw it told me they enjoyed it very much. The Ladysmith players also produced it here on the island about five years ago. but as I have been busy on my books I haven’t had time to find other
companies who might like to put it on.If anyone out there is interested, please contact me.

I’m the wickedest wickedest wickedest witch in the west
I guarantee I’ll give you my personal best
I’m wicked right down to the end of my nose
From the top of my head, to the tip of my toes
‘Cause I’m the wickedest wickedest wickedest witch in the west

I’m the beautifulest, charmingest, daintiest witch in the west
Sinderellas my name an’ sinnin’s what I do best
I jumps on children’s toys an’ then
I jumps on ’em all over again
So the Queen had me dumped in the pond an’ called me a pest

I’m the nastiest, awfullest spitefullest (but still charming) witch in the west
I put a hex on the queen and her daughter an’ all she loves best (her money).
Now the princess can only sing or hum
An’ I’ve predicted she’d marry a wandering bum
Just to think of the things I can do makes me feel blest

I’m the connivingest, cleverest, schemingest witch in B.C.
An’ I’m after a box of delights down in that tree
This tale’ll send you home in tears
‘Cause it’s my way or the highway, dears
Oh the scams on the railway’s got nothin’ on me
’cause I’m the wickedest wickedest wickedest wickedest
Wickedest witch in B.C.

You can see this is a really silly song, but the witch is lots of fun

Tinderbox Witch

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